We have a new name!
We thought that the use of the word Ladies in our former name Les Ladies was a little outdated and not inclusive of our nonbinary members. We hope you like this change! And because it's still two L's, we get to keep the logo, which makes me happy!
I am going to share the rawness of my recent heart break. I had the most amazing 6 months of my life after meeting the woman who I thought was my soulmate. We had unbelievable magic together. We were energetically connected. Others who witnessed our togetherness, strangers even, would comment on the magic between us. And then unexpectedly, she ended the relationship. I was devastated. Angry. Grief stricken. In shock. In unbelievable pain. It felt like a landmine went off deep inside my being leaving nothing but shards inside that cut my heart with every breath.
And today, three weeks later, I am feeling joy. Granted, it's a journey, and one that I will continue to traverse. I still have my moments, but I've moved through so much and I wanted to share with you what's worked.
Friends! There is no substitute for having a caring listening ear, a shoulder to cry on, to be held, to be accepted and to hold sacred space for all my emotions.
Rage Room. A wonderful friend came over and suggested we go to a rage room, my first time. Busting glass bottles with a metal baseball bat and heavy steel pole was so satisfying. And speaking out loud all the things that I felt angry, betrayed and hurt about was very cathartic and got the energy moving, replacing the feeling of implosion.
Journaling. Writing down everything helped me to better understand what I was feeling and why. After the rage room, I wrote 14 pages in my journal. And I'm not a big journal person either! I also wrote poetry.
Finding Joy. I did things that I knew I loved, namely dancing. It felt so good to move my body, to be in sync with another human being.
Releasing & Moving On process. On Christmas Day, I was so livid after receiving a short video of her speaking while the camera focused on a single red rose that was laying on the bed where we made love. In the bedroom that she had just redecorated in preparation for my arrival. I was hosting a holiday gathering later that day and I couldn't imagine doing so with the amount of volcanic anger that was inside me. I forced myself to go through the process I teach in Releasing & Moving On (the second module of the year-long Love Essentials program). Imagine that! I was very resistant to doing it, but forced myself to anyway. I was desperate and couldn't think of any other options. And guess what, IT WORKED! I was in such a different space by the time guests started arriving, and had one of the most fun nights hosting at my home. I released so much of my pain, anger, and most especially, deep grief.
Inner Child Work. I was able to trace some of my deep emotions to childhood trauma, and did some experiential inner child work at a New Culture New Year's Retreat. It was very powerful. I realized how much I need to do extreme self care to heal and rebuild from this experience, be gentle on myself, forgive myself for not being perfect, and focus on learning and self-soothing.
Self Love. I totally indulged in self pleasuring and gentle loving caresses of my body on New Years Day. It was so healing. I also have been giving myself permission to just have downtime.
Therapy. My therapist has been there for me through this whole relationship, helping me navigate the challenges, doing the deep trauma healing. Before things abruptly ended, we did a whole day retreat with just us and a couples therapist. What I learned from that experience will definitely help me in future relationships. So many powerful tools and models that I was able to implement and see how transformative they could be when either party (or both) is triggered.
Love Essentials
This is my year long program that is based on 30 years of intensive training, therapy, neuroscience research and experience. After this year's incredible growth experience, there will be major upgrades, particularly in the realm of connection and communication. Perhaps you too have lingering heartache that you would like to release. Or maybe you just want to increase your capacity for healthy relationships, whether you're already in one or not. This is the program for you!
End Goal
You will learn foundational and advanced skills that will support you to be the most amazing version of yourself, let go of past pain and resentment, create the life you want, how to recognize and respond to red flags, have healthy conflict, keep the love alive, and ultimately experience healthy, meaningful, soul-enriching relationships! And along the way, you will be supported by a fabulous group of beings all on the same journey.
Relationship Fitness
Relationship fitness is your capacity for handling life’s relationship challenges with a positive mindset rather than getting stressed, upset or quitting. Let’s use a physical fitness analogy. If you are of average physical fitness, you can climb hills that are relatively small hills and you won’t get physically stressed. But if you try to scale a mountain, then your physical fitness level may not be quite enough for that. You’re likely to be out of breath, be physically stressed and you’re not going to be able to handle it.
Same with relationships. If you’re of average relationship fitness, you can handle an okay level of stress or upset, but we know that sooner or later something traumatic will happen, there will be a mountain to climb, (like Covid), and you want to be up for the task! So the key question is, how do you build your relationship fitness so that you can climb this mountain?
That’s what Love Essentials is all about. By building your relationship fitness muscles, you’re going to be happier and you’re going to have more capacity for positive relationships because you made your relationship muscles stronger.
Each module consists of 6 weekly 1.5 hr live sessions with Cynthia Way, Master Certified Coach, and/or Aimee Shapiro, Licensed Clinical Social Worker. You'll have a rotating Reflection Partner to check in with during the week. You'll have "homework" designed to help you integrate what you're learning. If you can't make a session, you can still watch the recording and access the materials from our site.
The first module, Self Love & Compassion, is FREE! And starts Jan 17. Click here and RSVP on the event tab.
You'll Be Part of Something Bigger.
We believe that:
Creating a community of like-minded beings is key. One that feels safe and one that encourages you to be all of who you can be.
Everyone can learn how to find, create and maintain deeply satisfying, healthy, loving relationships.
It all starts with self-awareness and self-love, a foundation to our LOVE ESSENTIALS program.
Personal commitment and the support of other amazing beings accelerates your growth and development.
We're all in this together!
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